To Work or Not To Work...?

Retirement began, for me, in late August of 2005. I never thought I'd be any good at it because I was always a person who got the most done when there was the most to do.

Without a schedule to be met I often did nothing or... as close to nothing as possible: watched TV, read, napped, shopped, vegged. That's been the story of my life in Sarasota.

It's taken me this long to begin wishing I had somewhere productive to go and do.

I'm thinking about a job. Maybe at a hospital where there's always a bustle of activity. Or a school. It should be somewhere I could put my own special talents to work: indomitable perkiness, positive thinking, an ability to rationalize even the most outrageous situations, organizing anything and anyone, never saying die.

BUT it must also be forgiving of my less-than-sterling traits: walking into walls, singing out loud, being figuratively and literally dizzy sometimes, having memory lapses, getting lost....

At 64 I might be able to find a paying job but I'm more likely to find something as a volunteer.

A hospital volunteer sounds do-able.

I'd make an excellent greeter because I'm friendly and make a good first impression (it's only after you get to know me you begin to understand how truly demented I've become!). Or a tutor for children stuck in the hospital but still capable of doing their schoolwork. A reader for those who can't read themselves? I could push the newspaper/candy cart around the halls and chat people up as I wander.

Twenty hours a week would be plenty for me to commit to, I think.

I wonder if Sarasota Memorial is ready for me??

Think I'll stop there today and check out the possibilities. Who knows? It could be win/win for SMH and for TWJ.

Let the games begin!

The Beck and Call Girl

Switched from Comcast to Verizon FIOS today and - oy - such a deal!

If I stayed up for three days (like I did when I got cable for the first time in the '80's) I still wouldn't have enough time to try all the channels I now have on my TV.

Correction: my SIX TV's!?

Yup. TV's very important in The Widow Judy's household.

Still, I'm sure poor Tom is not resting quietly at this moment knowing we didn't get the baseball package too and won't, therefore, be having the opportunity to see twelve different baseball games daily this season as we did when he was alive. If the Tigers stumble I still may have to sign up for it knowing Tom would want me to even if we never actually turn a game ON.

It's the principle, see?

The installer, Ryan, was here from 8:15 'till just about 12:00 hooking us up, literally. He was very professional and explained all the particulars but his explication fell on deaf ears; while he pushed button after button showing me all the tricks I tuned out knowing I would never remember a darn thing he said.

I have to do it myself if I'm going to learn the ins and outs. I know this is shocking but I plan to read the instructions.

Fancy THAT!

Apparently, if a channel is showing a movie there's a way to play it any time YOU'RE ready regardless of the scheduled showtime!? Sounds like the work of the devil, doesn't it?

If I'm reading correctly, I have 1951 channels not counting the On Demand options.

See what I mean about staying up ad nauseum???

I have figured out how to DVR the shows I want but, so far, I am in the dark how to interrupt the DVRing and start a show over from the beginning. I'm putting that on tomorrow's learning agenda.

For tonight, I'm happy to click and flip and just generally revel in the glory that is having 2000+ channels at my beck and call.

Decadence, thy name is Verizon FIOS!

Pipe Dreams

Anybody want to go on a cruise?

My passport arrived two days ago - I've never had one before - and I thought, "Well, I'll just go on a little cruise, I will."

Called the travel agency and, without a roomate it's twice as expensive!

Who knew??

There's always a catch, isn't there.... Before, I had a partner and no passport; now, I have a passport and no partner?!

Where's the fairness in THAT!??

A cruise has always been an 'out there' dream and I'm not sure why. Truth is, I'm terrible on boats and generally end up puking in my hat! Vomiting takes away a lot of the supposed "fun" as you can well imagine.

My dad had a nice boat when he retired in Bel Air Bluffs. He would bluster even way back then about how expensive it was to spend the day on the water. Or OFF the water - there always seemed to be SOMETHING that required another bucket of money to keep the boat happy?? That's why, on Judy's Big Wish List, owning a boat has always been dead last.

I'd really like to go to Europe. FLY to Europe, that is. Unfortunately, I don't have any friends living in Paris or Rome and I'm too old to hostel it so that's probably a pipe dream too. TWJ is on a budget, after all.

Guess I'll compromise and go to the beach on Siesta Key. It IS the reason so many people visit me here in Sarasota!! They'll deny that, naturally, but when I lived on the east side of Detroit did I have a lot of company?? No, I did not....

It's fun to dream about going to new places. Think I'll take a little nap right now
and see where I wind up.

Dreaming is free, right?

The Shark

Today I did something I haven't done since I was a teenager. I washed the kitchen floor.

LOL. Not a very exciting beginning for the blog, is it? Sorry 'bout that!?

Tom asked for that duty when we were first married and who was I to deny him that particular pleasure!??

Since he died, the floor has only been entirely washed one time and my brother-in-law magnanimously did that for us while we were in Michigan farewelling Tom.

That brings me back to today.

It was a bi@#*!! I'm too old to be sitting on my butt scrubbing one tile after another. And you KNOW what'll happen - they'll just get dirty again??

Plus, being as obsessive-compulsive as I am, I couldn't just scrub the tiles I also felt the need, being at that level, to wash all the lower cabinets AND rearrange the interiors of those that have gotten out of control.

I wasn't having ANY fun but I, of course, couldn't stop once I'd begun... that would be heresy! The Widow Judy does not comprehend anything other than a job well done?! I'm a 100 per-center in all things.

I got about 2/3 of the way through the kitchen and that commercial for The Shark came into my head. I need that!! I have tile in the kitchen, the foyer, the laundry room, and two bathrooms - I'm the person The Shark was meant for!!!

So I headed to Bed Bath and Beyond just as soon as I finished and got dressed for the day.

$99.00. Seemed like a bargain if only to save my knees and hips!

Science is wonderful. The Shark is mine all mine!! You'll be able to eat off my floors from now on.

But please don't....

The Odd Woman

Suzy and I were in downtown Sarasota at Two Senoritas waiting for a table this afternoon; a large group was in front of us.

"7," they told the hostess and I started counting: 3 men and 4 women. There was an odd woman in the party.

It was like a slap in the face to me. Now I, The Widow Judy, will be also known as The Odd Woman??

Yikes. I hadn't thought that far ahead until this afternoon. Never having ever in my life been a single... this is very strange.

Anybody (and I mean ANYbody) who's ever known me is laughing out loud right now at the irony. The truth is, everywhere and anywhere I've ever gone with anyone I've ever known I have always always always BEEN the "odd woman"!!

No one is odder than I.

I do things and say things that, to me, seem entirely normal, sane and obvious but which, to others, are notable - and not always in a good way!?

I sing out loud all the time. To me it seems perfectly within the bounds of propriety but, often, others seem to respond with less than great enthusiasm for my singing and/or my songs. I don't have a great voice - I'm saving that for my next incarnation - but I love to sing. And so I do.

And, yes, sometimes I make up my own silly songs which was a little cuter when my children were preschoolers and they would sing along but the cute factor has undeniably waned as I've gotten older. That hasn't stopped me though.

I can't seem to help it. I see a word or a situation and I start rhyming then the rhyme becomes a poem and finally I put it to music in my head. Voila: a song is born!

Doesn't everybody do that??

Also, I smile. I smile at people I know and people I don't. I'm an indiscriminate smiler.

And a hello-er. I smile and say hello to people all the time. Why wouldn't I?? I'm in a space, we're sharing that space for a finite amount of time, why wouldn't I want people to feel welcome being where they are?

My father always said, "Keep smiling. It makes people wonder what you're up to!" He probably stole that from someone else but I took it to heart and made it a way of life.

I strike up ad hoc conversations with children, old people, all people. My sister-in-law is mortified by this and I have never been able to fathom why it's such an embarrassment for her. Poor dear, her mother did exactly the same thing her whole life long and when the three of us would be out together - well - let's just say that Sharon would die a little every time.

My clothes and hair draw attention almost daily. People literally stop me on the street all the time to ask where I get my hair done or to say my blouse (or shoes or top or bottom)look nice and where did I get them. They are, believe me, nothing special but still, somehow, they merit attention and that strikes me as odd every time.

I shop at Macy's and J.C. Penney and Walmart. I'd shop at Target but they just don't have things that fit me. Can you get any more mundane than those three aforementioned stores?

I don't think so.

"The Odd Woman". It's like I've come full circle with Tom's death. I am now literally as well as figuratively "odd".

In one sense, I wouldn't have it any other way; in another... well... that could be more problematic. I can't imagine being single so it's hard to prophecy how that will play out over time.

Stan? Are you out there??

Making Lemonade

My nephew Lee is quite a guy. His maternal grandmother, my sister Toot, has thought of him as extra special since the day he was born. I know this because she calls him "the messiah" and always has.

It's lower case so... no blasphemy intended.

Kind of like, "our father who art in heaven" referencing our own dad? She coined that phrase too.

Lee is the only kid I know who takes a "no" answer and still runs with it!?

Such was the case when he got to UMaine's Orono campus four years ago. He played baseball in high school very successfully so he tried out for UMaine's team at college.

Didn't make it.

Most kids would just slink away with their tails between their legs but not Lee. He showed up at the coach's office early the following morning asking what he needed to work on so he'd have a better shot the next year. Coach told him to "hit the weight room" but saw something special in a kid who didn't resent being cut AND who obviously loved the sport. He was offered the job of Team Manager.

He took it.

And he ran with it.

He did everything asked of him and lots LOTS more.

Coach noticed.

When Lee tried out in his sophomore year he was cut again!? This time he was named a student assistant coach. That meant he got to travel with the team!! True to form, Lee made a name for himself working hard with and for the kids AND the other coaches as well.

Now Lee's the first base coach so he's authentically involved in every game. His plan is to stay at Orono when he graduates next winter going straight on to graduate school and continuing to work with the baseball team.

His eventual plan is to become a professional college or major league baseball coach; from the praise heaped on him from the staff he's working with at UMaine, that seems very do-able.

He was thrown a curve not making the team as a player but he persevered. I call that Making Lemonade!

May Day

May first was one of my favorite holidays growing up in Hopkinton, MA.

We'd make "baskets" out of Dixie cups, decorate the hell out of them with drawings, construction paper, lace doilies, even fabric and then create a handle from pipe stems, ribbons or lace.

Candy, flowers we'd pick from our own spring gardens, and a funny or rhyming unsigned note about the recipient would be the piece de resistance. We'd stealthily approach the porches of our friends, ring the doorbell and then disappear before the door opened. There we'd be, giggling madly behind a bush, a car, a tree trunk as our friends discovered their treasure.

UNsigned!! Figuring out who gifted you with these little bits of heaven was a major part of the excitement.

The making and the doing was so much fun that, often, I'd empty the baskets I got and fill my newly-made ones with treats I'd received from someone else so I could give out more and more of them!

More than Easter, May Day truly signalled spring had sprung.

In Massachusetts, Easter weather was generally still pretty blustery whereas, by May first, it was assured that jonquils, tulips, lilacs would definitely be blooming.

I loved the baskets best of all. I'd line them up on my bedroom windowsill and use them to hold stuff until they got too ratty.

There's never been a May Day that I haven't remembered all my friends and me surprising one another with these home-made tokens of affection.

I'm feeling the love so well, in fact, that I think I might just get out my art and craft supplies to transform the cups in my pantry and drop them off on my friends' doorsteps here in Florida today!! What a fun idea.

Let's ALL do it!? We can start a tradition and spread the love wherever we are.

I double dog dare ya'!!!