Well...
I'm in my bathing suit, got my beach hat on AND my Jellies. All I have to do is simply bring my book out to the lanai and sit in the sun or - maybe, even - drive to the beach and sit by the water's edge.
WHY IS THIS SO HARD?
Haven't been on the lanai yet that I haven't burst into tears; that's just so silly.
When you live in southwest Florida the pool and the beach aren't optional they are de rigeur!
Some self-talk is in order. I can do it, there's no doubt about that. But I seem to be caught somewhere between the moon and New York City every time I make a plan to 'git 'er done'.
Any little diversion will do to send me off in another direction. So far today I've used dusting, arranging my shoes by color and style in the closet, chatting on Facebook and playing Scrabble there.
Blogging is my Last Ditch. When I'm done here I'm really truly going to face my devil and do what sunlovers do: sit in the sun!
My poor tan is a mottled mess and really needs work. My beachbag is organized to within an inch of its life. "Twilight" is a fun and compelling read. The floppy hat will hide my tears from prying eyes. It's a gorgeous day.
I'm ready.
Just one more deep breath, Judy. You can do it! You WANT to do it!
The rest of your life is right out there waiting for you.
Aye, there's the rub.
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you can do it. So what if you cry? I don't think you should avoid crying. The more you let it happen, it will decrease little by little. That's why you are there. To enjoy that sun, it's hard to go it alone, for sure. But for the love of us stuck in MI, go into the sun!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI think that since he died, I feel closest to Dad when I'm in the sunshine. Maybe if you think of it that way, you'll want to run right out to the Lanai and stay for a while. xo
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